love, masculinity, poetry

Strings of light and shadow

There are moments

Hung suspended

A string of lights

Still lit,

Long past the season,

A few bulbs, dead with time

But sat there,

Bathed in a carnival of light,

All festive colours

Even the cheer has a dim memory,

But the shadows matter as much

As the light they oppose,

And between them both

I sit

And hold your hand

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grief, love, masculinity, poetry, women

Worlds

Worlds

Where we never met

Where I didn’t message you

Or I died tragically young

Terribly old

Where I lived in shadow

Afraid to let the light touch my soul

Worlds Where I didn’t

Betray my marriage and don’t feel

Guilt and relief when I look at the space on my finger

Where I didn’t let her go

Or she never arrived

Where I was smart enough

Good enough

Where I didn’t feel like dying

Worlds other than this

But here in this one

All and nothing

Alone in a way I can’t explain or justify

This is the only world I know

And across them all

You

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beauty, love, masculinity, poetry, women

Lights In The Sky

Before they launch,

We would

Find one another

In the dark

Suspended in amber

Amidst a throng of witnesses

As they whispered

Hopes

Fears

There are lights in the sky

But in the end

If it were too dark to read

I would just want to look

At you

For the

First

Last

Time

The look in my eyes

Time enough

A kiss

To say one another’s names

Then they are

Here

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beauty, desire, love, lust, poetry, women

a study in tension

what the sight and sound

scent of you feeds

the absence of it

done as much from consideration

i mean

you’re into the idea of it

but life is abrasive

it wears you down

but i am wired

built around

upon a foundation of wild appetite

not furtive but i sit with it

the release i seek

pin you down

tear you to throbbing pieces

with the unadulterated force of it

but you are safe

the washes of day keep my actions

clean as a priest’s hands

but the night will come

and i will, not reach,

but

take

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beauty, love, masculinity, poetry, women

Temple Food

Nothing to anger the blood

A slow breath at morning,

The day ahead,

Unwelcome but necessary

The light is washed out

I don’t welcome the resemblance

But we know different

I am calm,

Set in accepting opposition.

What will the pressure teach you today?

And my goals?

In my pocket, warm and fed

Nurtured against the last traces

Of winter

Stubborn in remaining

But soon we shall leave

With bellies full of

Temple

Food

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beauty, love, masculinity, poetry, women

Civil Twilight

Does the soul bruise

Breathe in the chill perfume

Of evening

As civil twilight tips its hat

In my direction

Spent days in comfortable silence

Speaking on the page

Life is a symphony

Some melodies remain

Others added

Some dissonance

Kept and others

Are wrong notes

Useful to remind me

That the trick is to keep playing.

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love, masculinity, poetry, women

Meat, Salt, Water.

Not so much simple

As elegant

Tender to the possibilities

But within myself

A king in his kingdom

Tasted failure more than once

But won’t swallow it

Until the alchemy of determination

Makes it sweet

And made sleek with certainty

Happy without the pofaced rhetoric of

a past where I believed

I knew what happened when you’re

Making other plans

Escaping the idea there was a way to

Have my cake and eat it too

But now there is meat

Salt and water

Strong enough to bear it all

Love until you bruise.

Leave you to sleep and

Watch you

Ache with all the sweet, daft shit

I’m too strong to say

But what you feed in me

Knows.

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