Meditation used to be something I sneered at. It felt like an affectation, a practice that was more to do with telling people that you did it and actually doing it.
Now I feel it’s an essential part of my day. It’s not at a set time, or a set place and I do use guided meditations because there are things that I want my subconscious to focus on, so that I can handle other things consciously. I believe in it because it gives me focus and calms me so that I am more effective in doing things. Also it feels really good, there are sessions that are tough and I come away feeling futile but they’re part of the process.
Failure happens, but only if you decide that it’s a reason to stop then it actually is failure. I know NLP comes in for a lot of criticism but I found it useful in a few ways, and some of the precepts it has are really useful. I like to look at models of success and achievement, one of whom is MMA fighters, particularly those in the UFC and I was listening to a podcast interview with Brendan Schaub, and one of the things he said was about potential fighters who needed a pep talk, in that if they did, they shouldn’t be fighting.
I get down about things sometimes, but I know it’s just fear and anxiety making themselves known when I don’t harness them to a particular process. Every day though, I write and I read. I have cut back on television and gaming, more and more as time goes on. I am not limiting myself to culture, but I am developing and honing myself because the better work I produce, the better I feel and as a consequence I find it all the more appealing to write and create.
So I meditate on my writing, visualising it as my career, I have images and auditory pictures that I visualise as part of that process. I have not written as a view to anything more than expressing myself on the page, it’s not the ‘being a writer’ that drives me, it’s ‘having written’ and knowing that I have finished things that empowers me to keep going. I want to get better at it but I know that I never will master it. If you’re always hungry, pushing at the edge of your fear, then the work you will produce will always reflect that. I used to read and marvel at the magic of words on the page but from there, I know now that I was reading someone who had written vastly more than I had. What I know now is that the work will come if you can keep doing it.
This could serve as a meditation.